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Talking to Family About Adoption: Dealing with Unsupportive Friends or Family

Talking to your friends and family is essential when considering adoption for your baby. Here, you can learn the best ways to discuss your thoughts and decisions.

An unplanned pregnancy can be a very emotional and stressful situation. If you have decided adoption is the best path for you and your baby, it helps to have support from your family and friends.

Explaining your decision to give your child up for adoption can be difficult, but necessary for those closest to you. But, what happens when friends and family do not support your decision?

If you’re struggling with unsupportive parents, friends, or family when choosing adoption for your baby, this guide can help.

Below, you will find:

Keep in mind, no matter the opinions or views of friends and family members, you are the only one who can decide on what is best for you and your baby. Nobody can tell you what you can or cannot do during your unplanned pregnancy.

Anytime you need support, answers to questions, or just professional guidance, you can fill out this form to speak with an adoption specialist. They will provide the resources you need to make sure you feel completely comfortable as you begin your adoption journey.

In the meantime, continue reading to learn about the benefits of talking to family about adoption, even if they are initially unsupportive. 

How to Talk to Your Family about Adoption

Choosing adoption for your baby is one of the most important and selfless decisions you can ever make. The support of those closest to you can help you feel confident in your decision and give you someone to lean on throughout what can be a very emotional journey. Often, those who are initially unsupportive of your decision are doing so out of love and concern for you and because they do not fully understand the process and its benefits

While it may sound easier said than done, the best way to talk to your parents about adoption or how to tell people you are giving your child up for adoption is by being open and honest. A few ways to do this are by:

Discussing your Reasons for Choosing Adoption

Every adoption situation is unique, so your reasons for deciding adoption is the right choice will be personal to you.

Talk to your parents about adoption and why this is best for you and your baby. Discuss how this is one of the most important decisions you will make in your life and was not something you chose on a whim.

Explaining your decision to give up your child for adoption can be difficult. By being open and honest, you can build a level of love and trust with your parents, friends, and family that helps create the support you may need throughout your adoption.

Educating Them on the Adoption Process

Most unsupportive family or friends are hesitant to accept your decision because they don’t understand adoption. Unfortunately, these negative views have been created due to a lack of knowledge on how adoption truly works.

How you talk about adoption as a birth mother is very important towards gaining the love and support of family members — your discussions will likely include educating family and friends on the adoption process. 

You will want to explain each step in the adoption process:

Adoption continues to make progress, from what used to be a secretive decision viewed negatively by society to what is now celebrated and openly discussed. Education about the benefits and positive impact adoption has on everyone involved is helping to change the negative stereotypes. Social views on adoption are constantly changing for the better.

Not long ago, the majority of adoptions were closed, with little to no contact between the birth mother and adoptive family. Now, the majority are open adoptions with some form of contact continuing between the two after placement has occurred.

This level of openness helps strengthen the support system your baby will have as they grow older. When talking to family about adoption, educating them on the process, benefits, and overall impact may help change their negative views and open their eyes to the life-changing decision you are making.

Talking about the Adoptive Family

When you choose adoption, you are giving the gift of parenthood to a family. One of the best ways to talk to parents about your adoption is by explaining the life-changing impact on the adoptive family and the opportunity you are giving your baby. 

When talking to family about adoption, explain to your family or friends that you can choose a family that you think will be best for your baby based on your own preferences of:

Choosing the adoptive family for your baby is one of the most important and exciting decisions you will ever make. Depending upon the type of adoption you choose, you can create a lifelong bond with the adoptive parents. Including your family in discussions, the decision-making process, and more will help them feel involved and build a personal connection with the adoptive family.

Your friends and family can gain trust in knowing you are choosing a great family that will love and support your baby and confidence in your decision to change the lives of families who want to provide a lifetime of opportunity for your baby.

Discussing the Importance of Having a Support System

You know your family and friends best. When it comes to the best way to talk to family and friends about adoption, you know how to communicate with them better than anyone.

Explaining how appreciative you are of their love and support will go a long way. Expressing how important having them by your side will be for you and the success of your adoption cannot go undiscussed. 

For you and most family members and friends, adoption will likely be a new experience – and experience you can all support each other together. Explaining the decision to give your child up for adoption won’t be easy, but the more your friends and family can relate to your situation, the better chances of gaining their support throughout your journey.

Dealing with Unsupportive Family and Friends

When you choose adoption for your baby, you are the only one who can decide it is the best path for you and your baby. Even if friends or family are unsupportive and try to talk you out of placing your baby for adoption, you are in control. 

If you feel adoption is the best decision for you and your baby, do not let family or friends sway your decision.

Adoption is a very emotional time for everyone involved, and the support of your parents and friends is important. If you have talked to your friends and parents about adoption but they are still unsupportive, know that you will never have to go through your adoption alone. Support from your adoption specialist, other birth mothers, forums, groups, and more are all available whenever you need them. 

If you find yourself questioning how to talk to someone about adoption, whether for more information about the adoption process or to discuss unsupportive family and friends, you can fill out this online form to speak with an adoption specialist. They will be more than happy to answer any questions you may have, ease any concerns, and provide the resources you need.

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